John W. Baumgartner
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#StuffstudentsSay

288 - Haters

3/31/2020

Comments

 
Me: Make sure you're playing that part correctly.
*student puts on sunglasses*
Me: Why...?
Student: I'm blocking out all the haters.


I guess I'm a hater now. 😎
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287 - This is Who I am Now

3/30/2020

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Student: Hey, [student's brother], did you know that John believes the Earth is flat?
---
Student: Do you know what the brim of your hat reminds me of?
Me: No, what?
Student: That you think the Earth is flat.

I have NEVER believed the Earth is flat. 🤔
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286 - Names

3/17/2020

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Had my first online lesson today.
Me: You should get a real metronome.
Student: I hate metronomes.
Me: Learn to love it. I named my metronome.
Student: What is it, Satan?
Me: 😂


Then I remembered I named it because my college trombone teacher (who passed away 4 days ago) named his Hubert H. Humphrey Metronome (which, yeah 😝) and he suggested I name mine [btw, it weirdly DOES help]. Everything is a memory right now... 😢
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285 - Teaching in the Time of Coronavirus

3/13/2020

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Student 1: It smells bad in here.
Student 2: That's the smell of coronavirus!
---
Me: Do you have coronavirus?
5th-grade Student (completely deadpan; as though I was asking a stupid question): Yes.
---
High school student, saying goodbye: Well...good luck, I guess.


Welcome to teaching in the time of covid19, where conversations with students are all coronavirus, all the time. 😷🤒🤧
Comments

284 - Sleep

3/12/2020

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Student (after being out sick last week): All I did was sleep.
Me: Sleep...that sounds nice... What's it like?
Student: Sleep is like...heaven.


❤️
😴

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283 - Baby Shark

3/11/2020

Comments

 
Working on intervals with a student:
Me: An A to Bb is a half-step. It's like the Jaws theme, if you know it?
*student looks confusedly at me*
*I play/sing the Jaws theme*
Student: Isn't that Baby Shark?


I mean...yeah...but... 😩😢
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282 - En Espanol!

3/5/2020

Comments

 
Student, loudly, multiple times while walking past my door: ¡Me llamo comprende!

Tu no comprendes, mi joven estudiante.
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    Author

    I have been teaching music across the Twin Cities since 2011. Along with seeing students grow as musicians and people, one of the joys of teaching is the ridiculous things my students say.

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