*I write on whiteboard*
Overly-critical Student: I'm going to report you to your boss for your bad handwriting!
It was VERY legible... 🙄
*student receive band buck*
Student: Is this Bob Ross or George Washington?
Got an email from a student today [edited for readability]...
Student: Oh, hi, John, this is your favorite student, [name redacted]. So...you need to convince my mom to get me a trombone with a key/trigger/magic-lazy-person-button.
Me: What do you do when you read a book?
Student: Get pulled into the book by a wizard, then have to live through the book until it ends, then you can go back to your life after.
Accurate. But not the answer about pronouncing syllables and words I was looking for.
7th-grader: My brother gave me a couple solos; one I can play, and the other is too high for me right now. He told me I should be able to do it, because he did it when he was in 7th grade.
Yeah, her brother was a trumpet player. 😂
*student's trombone slide was having issues moving from greasing it too often [ikr???], so I cleaned it*
Student: So how often do you grease your slide?
Me: I probably *should* every 2-3 weeks, but normally it's a month or month and a half.
Student: Wait, so I'm not supposed to grease it every time I play?!
*insert George Takei "Oh my" here*
I have been teaching music across the Twin Cities since 2011. Along with seeing students grow as musicians and people, one of the joys of teaching is the ridiculous things my students say.